It’s clear that in the traditional sense, CurvedSince99 has an undeniable lack of swag. However, this swaggerless-ness is turning out to be a strength.
You would think that the best notification you could receive after leaving a job interview is an email, congratulating you on getting the position you applied for at the company. CurvedSince99 is likely to disagree.
On May 3rd, days after tweeting out a Triller for his new dontsleep produced song, “Shalom,” and minutes after leaving an interview for a Sales Associate position at Home Depot’s Garden Center (seriously), the Michigan rapper got a quote tweet from one of the underground’s biggest brands. 5,000 likes, 1,300 retweets, and multiple co-signs later, CurvedSince99 has emerged, not only as a newly hired Home Depot employee, but as an unlikely innovator of a new sub-genre.
At first glance, CurvedSince99 seems like a frat rapper. He looks like a business major with an affinity for Fireball and wall punching. His SoundCloud bio says “burb classics.” All signs point to him spitting rhymes about drinking beer and partying over 2011 Mac Miller type beats. However, when you break down the music for what it is, there’s no way to categorize it as “frat rap.” While Lil Dicky and Yung Gravy seem to be the last rappers riding that wave, CurvedSince99 is creating something new and all his own, something along the lines of corporate desk job rap.
Corporate desk job rap, or “post-frat rap” as it will be called from here on out, is what a frat star graduating from college and locking down a junior sales executive position at Yelp sounds like. It’s a style that 99 is pioneering, rapping clever, sometimes-goofy punchlines in a tone that’s more Caucasian than a Republican-only brunch spot in a gentrified neighborhood.
No matter the sub-genre being created right now, there are no other rappers whose vocals are completely devoid of the stylish pronunciation and vocal flair that’s become a staple in modern hip-hop. It’s clear that in the traditional sense, CurvedSince99’s has an undeniable lack of swag. However, this swaggerless-ness is turning out to be a strength. There’s no better example of this than the previously mentioned Triller.
This is a video that has garnered almost 150,000 views and dude is dancing in front of the camera looking like Russell Westbrook’s shootaround ballboy. Look at the surprisingly on-rhythm moves though! Look at the confidence of his necklace swipe! It’s not the confidence of Soulja Boy flexing his Louis shoes in front of a camel, or Kanye flexing his Louis shoes in a Paris hotel room. It’s the confidence of a college freshman who just used his fake ID to buy 3 handles of Burnett’s Cotton Candy Vodka to impress the girls in his dorm. It’s confidence that clearly, as evidenced by his recent rise, has resonated with an audience that’s continuing to grow.
While currently relevant white rappers only touch on their whiteness occasionally, 99 leans into it. His diction and over-annunciation of words remind listeners less of a rising SoundCloud star, and more of a Chuck Taylor, the white-faced news anchor Dave Chappelle played on Chappelle’s Show. Based on his three Trillers, 99’s outfit choices range from college student who rolled out of bed just in time to make their 9:30 lecture, to intramural frat-star who, “had a bunch of D1 offers until he blew out his knee,” to Spring breaker at Daytona Beach.
These factors endear CurvedSince99 to audiences because he comes across as funny, relatable, and authentic, but none are the primary reason why this rapper is generating significant buzz. The main reason why 99’s stock is rising isn’t because of his gimmick as the most overtly-white Caucasian rapper of all time. It’s far more simple than that — it actually sounds good.
The latest addition to his catalogue, “NO GO,” cements CurvedSince99’s position as leader of this post frat-rap movement. Spitting over sparse, bass heavy production courtesy of Gosakke, 99 showcases his knack for hilarious punchlines, immediately hitting listeners with bars like, “I’m smoking on gas, you smoking on Nova // It’s 2019 you’re still saying YOLO,” and “You got a foriegn but my Civic go faster.” The simplistic hi-hat and snare pattern gives the rapper plenty of space to put his talent for technically sound, energetic flows on display. He switches things up half-way through, taking his voice up to a higher register, and serving heat and braggadocio to his detractors. “Geeked up cause I know it’s my time // How you rap but you can’t even rhyme?”
By the time this minute and a half-long track is over, three facts will be abundantly clear to every listener: CurvedSince99 does not fuck with groupies, “Yes, Sir” ad-libs are awesome, and the way his career is ascending, he’ll be able to quit working at Home Depot very soon. Stream “NO GO” below.